I think I baked just about every flavour of pie there is on this planet by being the model housewife. The best pie does not involve an oven though. The recipe includes a dashing lad's dipstick, a bed-- though not necessarily, and my aching cunt.

I'm probably bloody horrible at flirting now but I'm still going to cast a line in case someone takes the bait. I'm not as flexible as I'd like to be but I'll be sure to makeup for it. Other than that, I'm not looking for anything serious. It's been ...

When I was up the duff with my first child, I was unbelievably randy yet my husband wouldn't even lay a finger on me. Now that I'm in my 50s, I never expected to be more randy than I was then. I hope I won't end up as disappointed and disgruntled as ...

Mimosas in the morning is a blessing in disguise, I have to tell you I would bathe myself in it if I can. What would sound more inviting is having someone lick the drink off of my busty knockers after I "spilled" it down my cleavage.

My sex life is as dry as the Sahara dessert and I do not appreciate it one bit. I mean, it would be lovely to be wooed from time to time, but a good shag is hard to come by at my age. Not impossible though, I just know it.

Taking control of other people's pleasure is what I thrive for. After years and years of experience, I can make a mean looking bloke melt into a puddle at my feet. I also like dictating when they're allowed to cum and maybe punish them when they make...